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No, Trump did not become an overnight ‘crypto billionaire’

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President Donald Trump’s meme coin may be a textbook cash grab — not unlike his $60 made-in-China Bibles and his $400 gold sneakers — but it’s not the kind of venture that can catapult his wealth into the stratosphere.

Some news outlets reported an absolute melt-up in Trump’s net worth over the weekend, and those figures have run wild on social media. Respectfully, though, you have to squint really hard and swallow a giant red crypto pill to conclude that the president’s net worth suddenly shot up 800% on the back of a digital asset that is functionally useless (more on that in a moment).

He’s still a billionaire, to be sure, but a single-digit one — hundreds of billions of dollars away from the levels of the wannabe tech oligarchs who surrounded him at Monday’s inauguration.

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